In My Dreams (First Tracks Book 2) Read online

  In My Dreams

  Book Two

  First Tracks

  Kristen James

  © 2016 Kristen James

  www.writerkristenjames.com

  www.facebook.com/WriterKristenJames

  Newsletter Signup

  Also by Kristen James:

  All in my Head, First Tracks series, Bk 1

  Stranger in my Bed

  More Than Memories, Bk 1

  A Wedding to Remember, Bk 2

  Embers of Hope, Bk 1

  More Than a Promise, Bk 2

  Costa Rica

  In A Field of Oranges

  Point Hope

  A Cowboy for Christmas

  First Tracks – When you get to leave your mark on the fresh pow before anyone else!

  In My Dreams, Book Two

  They can finally be together…right?

  Avery almost lost Marcus while he was in a coma. She couldn’t think past saving him. Now that he’s awake, she can finally see and touch him, but she can’t hear his thoughts or feel his emotions anymore. What if he doesn’t need her? Marcus wants her to go back to Ashland to catch up in college and fix things with her friends. She’s not ready to face that mess.

  Marcus was a gold medalist in Sochi but now he’s stuck in physical therapy, dreaming of being with Avery and returning to his life. Is his snowboarding career over? Will he ever play his guitar or draw again? And can he let Avery be with someone who’s so damaged?

  They’re together—but it’s not what they expected. Marcus has a long recovery ahead of him and Avery needs to put her life back together. Can they make it in the real world?

  Prologue

  (Included as an epilogue

  in All in my Head)

  Avery

  I look like a maniac and I don’t care.

  I ran down the hospital hallway, dodging people without apologizing, tears running down my face and a guitar bouncing against my back. My hair was having a fantastically frizzy day due to the weather, or maybe my crazy life, and I felt it whipping around behind me. I tore around a corner, my shoes sliding before grabbing on.

  I had to get to him right now.

  He remembers me.

  It’s okay.

  Everything’s okay now.

  If Marcus remembered me, then I wasn’t schizophrenic and making all this up. He had been in my head, sharing my life, listening to every thought. People would believe me now. He could tell his parents, his sister, my friends—everyone who thought I’d lost it.

  It didn’t make any sense, but it was true. It was true!

  The room numbers were climbing and I skidded to a stop, sliding past the door. Grabbing the door jamb, I pulled myself back and threw myself through the doorway.

  “Marcus!”

  Four people stared at me, stopping me in my tracks. This wasn’t the rush-in-and-kiss-him that I’d imagined. His parents stood by the door and Jen stood next to the bed where Marcus laid. Tom and Elaina shared a skeptical glance. They had tossed me out as a crazy stalker before, and now they glanced at each other, not sure what to think. Tom narrowed his eyes through his super thick lenses. They were still worried I’d hurt their son. His sister Jen started to smile at me but the tension in the room stopped her cold too.

  I finally looked at Marcus. He had his bed raised like he was waiting for me.

  “Avery. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I—” He broke off and a smile flashed across his face. “You brought my guitar.”

  “Yeah… how many times have you yelled at me to grab it?” I tried for a laugh at my lame joke and set it on a hospital chair. What could I say to him in front of his family? Nervous, I stepped past his parents and rushed to the bed, avoiding their gazes.

  “We’ll wait outside for a bit,” Jen said, her voice cautious. And then, thankfully, she herded her parents out of the room. They were quiet until they stepped out, and then their voices mingled together and faded. At least they weren’t standing right outside the door.

  “Marcus,” I whispered, my voice breaking as fresh tears filled my eyes. I took a step closer to the bed but something held me back. Did he still like me, now that he could see me face to face? Maybe I wouldn’t live up to the fantasy. Maybe he just needed me before, but not anymore, not when he had his life and body back. I glanced down at myself because I couldn’t even remember what I was wearing.

  What did he think? I couldn’t tell. I couldn’t hear him.

  “Ave?”

  That prodded me into motion and I walked to the edge of the bed. His light amber brown eyes searched mine, asking silent questions. He reached out to me with his good arm—the other one sat in a cast and sling. I took his hand, feeling his warmth in a new way. He turned his hand to entwine our fingers, then looked down, confused. I watched his expression and our hands, wondering if he felt weak after being in the coma.

  “Marcus.” It felt so good to say his name and see him here with me like this. I’d seen him in my mind’s eye, and in pictures online, and even here sleeping in this bed, but this was different. He glanced up, starting to smile, his eyes mirroring my emotions. Amazement. Surprise that we made it here. Fear.

  “It was all real?” he asked, still staring at me, and lifting his other hand to caress my cheek. I closed my eyes and leaned into him, taking a big, shaky breath.

  “It had to be. There’s no other explanation.”

  “Come here, babe.”

  I leaned down and slid my arms around him. We came together slowly, like we were both unsure of this new reality. What was he thinking? But once I felt him this close and smelled his scent under the hospital smells, my breath quickened until I started crying and clinging to him. His fingers sank into my hair and he kissed my head, saying my name. When I lifted my face, he smiled.

  Oh, my god, is he handsome. And real. And right here.

  We paused, looking at each other, grins coming at last. Then his face went serious, something new in his eyes. He touched my chin and we stretched toward each other, our lips meeting softly.

  A shock wave rolled down my body.

  His lips, so full, so soft…so wanting.

  His breath smelled of mint. I smiled as his lips moved on mine. I’d somehow gotten halfway up on the bed to kiss him back, my hands gently exploring him. His hands shook against me—from desire or his injuries?

  How fragile was he?

  Would this hurt him?

  A noise rose up his throat. Energy zinged through my veins. With my eyes closed, my body felt like it was floating. He hung onto me tight, his tongue suddenly teasing my lips, before he pulled me further back with him. At the contact, my body came to life, surprising me. We’d been so close but unable to touch before, not really touch. I pulled back, opening my eyes and finding his were staring back, warm and dancing.

  “Avery.”

  My lips tingled. All of me tingled. I heard my ragged breathing and laughed. “Marcus.”

  Suddenly, he pulled me forward, pressing another kiss onto my mouth. Then he pulled me back and stared at me, taking me in detail by detail.

  “Damn, you are beautiful,” he whispered. “And you look even better from this perspective… I love you, Avery.”

  I started to reply and couldn’t find my voice. His eyes grew shiny.

  I pulled in a quick breath, still so amazed in be in this moment. “I love you.”

  Our smiles grew together until we started laughing.

  “Everything’s different now,” I said, my voice breaking.

  “Better.” His smile faded. “Right?”

  “Right.” I glanced toward the door. What would his family think? What would we tell them?

  His hand came up to my face
. “Ave, we’ll figure it out.”

  I lay my head on his chest, breathing in his scent. I could feel him, smell him, kiss him!

  “We’ll figure everything out.” His voice came softly as his fingers threaded through my hair. “I love you and we’re together. That’s what matters now.”

  Closing my eyes, I decided to worry about everything else later. He was right. Only this mattered now. We were together, really together.

  Chapter One

  Marcus

  She was real and here.

  It’s good, yo, it’s all good.

  I ran that thought on repeat while I held her close with my workable arm. Damn the right one for being in a cast! I wanted both arms around her, her body pressed all the way to mine, all the way down to our feet. My breaths came in quick puffs, emotion blowing up my chest, and I inhaled her scent. Her hair tickled my neck as I pulled my fingers through it. I couldn’t hold her close enough.

  It didn’t make any sense but nothing else did either. When did the wreck happen? How hurt was I? How long was I out? And was all of that real, being in her head and getting to know her? A thousand questions raced around inside my head, mixing with all the memories coming back from my time with Avery. Inside her head.

  How the hell did that work?

  We would figure it out together, like I said. But I knew it wasn’t some coma induced hallucination because she was here. Avery remembered too.

  Suddenly Avery laughed against my chest, shaking me. She sat up, still laughing hard like she’d lost it.

  “Do you realize this all started in a hospital room?” she asked.

  A second later I caught up with her—she meant back when she was the patient, and we were in the Medford hospital after her accident, and I was in her head.

  “Oh, yeah. It’s coming full circle, I guess.” I looked toward my bathroom door, trying to visualize those first few freaky-as-hell moments. I had been completely confused because I could see the bathroom and then her room, but no one would answer me when I talked.

  Meanwhile, my body had been up here in Portland. I don’t like thinking about it, but I ask her, “Were you as scared as I was?”

  Ave pulled in a deep breath and I reached out with my usable arm so she’d rest on me again. I needed her close.

  “I was scared,” she whispered, “but maybe not as scared as you. That had to be terrifying. I thought I’d lost it because I was hearing a voice, but you didn’t even have a body.”

  I rubbed her back and let the topic drop, but other uncomfortable thoughts quickly filled my head. How long had I been in this room? I remembered coming here while I was in Avery’s head and seeing my body laying here without me. I didn’t notice much about the room then, maybe because it’s a typical sterile, plain room with tan walls and yellow curtains the windows. They tried to brighten it up with those faded-out prints you see in hotels, except you don’t really notice them because the colors are so wimpy. The privacy curtain hanging between my bed and the door was a funny avocado green color that reminded me of my late grandmother’s decorating scheme.

  “What are we going to tell your parents?” she asked, speaking against my chest, just as I heard them come back into the room. I forced myself to breathe slowly so my heart wouldn’t race under Avery’s head. I usually go with the truth. But now? That wasn’t going to fly.

  “Uhh, Marcus? Avery?” My dad sounded so awkward saying her name. I tried to lift my head to see over Avery at him, but the effort was almost too much. She sat up and wiped her eyes. “Can we have a moment to talk to you?” he asked.

  Avery glanced at me, worry in her eyes as she stood up. While she had her eyes on me, I caught my dad’s judgmental eyes on her. I loved her wild hair and everything else about her, down to each freckle. But I could read my dad’s expression and knew she must look halfway crazy to him with her hair doing its own thing and her clothes all wrinkled.

  I put her through hell these last few weeks.

  That sent a crack across my heart as it all came back. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block out the strange panic hitting me.

  “Marcus?” Dad’s sharp voice preceded him as he rushed across the room.

  I shook my head, clearing it.

  “Dad, I’m fine.”

  My dad’s gaze jumped from Avery to me and back to her, and I suddenly realized he was standing between us, ready to defend me. Freaking hell.

  “Dad, sit down, calm down, kay?”

  This was weird for all of us, for sure. I didn’t like looking at everyone while lying down but I didn’t seem to have much choice. Avery glanced back at him, a hand on her neck.

  It’s okay, babe.

  Oh, yeah, she can’t hear me.

  “I’ll be outside,” Avery said as she slowly left, and she turned back toward me, her gaze penetrating right to my heart.

  She was barely outside the door before Dad pulled a chair up next to my bed, sat down and leaned forward. It was his ‘let’s have a talk’ mode. My mom stepped in and hovered by the bed, rubbing her hands together.

  “Listen, dad, I know what you want to talk about. And I want Avery here.”

  “Who is this girl, Marcus?” He exhaled for a long minute, shaking his head. “You didn’t even recognize her!”

  “She’s my girlfriend.” The words come easily. “I didn’t recognize her because I’d just woke up from a coma. Everything was a mess in my head.”

  “A friend of hers called the hospital—”

  “Dad, I know that. I know Jazz was worried about Avery and tried to warn you. I know you were doing the paperwork to take me off life support too. And I know Avery was trying to save my life.”

  Mom sucked her in breath as her hand flew to her chest. “Marcus… Who told you that?”

  “Avery obviously told him that,” Dad said bitterly. I shouldn’t have told them I knew, but I was angry suddenly—not because they had tried to follow my written wishes and pull the plug on me, but for the way they were treating Avery now.

  “Avery didn’t tell me that,” I added. “I just know.”

  My parents’ eyes were mortified and unbelieving before they exchanged a glance. My mom shook her head slowly.

  “Marcus, her friend said she’s been hearing voices.”

  “Hearing me.” My voice sounded tight, the way my entire body felt. I let my head drop back on the pillow and I closed my eyes, exhausted. Damn it, I’d said too much. My all too practical parents would never believe me.

  Through the following silence, I could feel them nodding at each other, probably mouthing words. I shouldn’t blame them for not accepting this, but it’s a struggle. I shouldn’t get so irritated at them for all the private communication either, but sometimes it’s annoying as hell.

  “Marcus, look at me. When did you meet her?” Mom asked. “Why didn’t you tell us about her?” That second question held a hint of hurt. And I’m not ready to answer yet.

  “You didn’t even remember her, then suddenly you do.” Dad leaned forward. “We haven’t heard anything about her before this. Where’s she from? Where’s her family?”

  That struck a nerve.

  “She lives right here in Oregon, in Ashland where she goes to college.” And I live in Colorado. Dude, it’s weird to suddenly know things about my life. It’s like I remembered that just now but knew it all along too. I started going through memories of back home, but it hit me. What would it mean for Avery and me?

  I realized my dad was waiting for an answer to something. “Huh?”

  “Does her family live here?” Dad repeated. Why was he stuck on that?

  “Dude, it doesn’t matter. She doesn’t have family. Her parents are gone. She has her friends, and me.”

  At that, Mom’s face softened, and she asked, “How is she doing with all of this?”

  Damn, I only had a few minutes with Avery. I didn’t know how she was doing. I couldn’t read her mind anymore or feel what’s going on inside her. It’d be useful right about now to
o.

  But this was better. We could really be together now.

  My parents waited on me. We’re close, but they haven’t treated me like this in a long time. This whole mess must have really shook them up.

  “Well, I don’t tell you everything going on in my life.” I didn’t want to hurt them but I couldn’t explain all of this to them yet. Maybe they’d forget what I said about Avery hearing me. Somehow I had to smooth this over. “Listen, you trust me, don’t you?”

  “I’ve always trusted you, son. But right now, you’re not thinking clearly. Your body’s been through hell and your mental state can’t be the best right now.”

  “I need Avery here.”

  Mom put her hand on dad’s shoulder. Neither said anything.

  “She makes me happy. I want her here right now.” I decided not to let them argue with me about it. “Listen, we’ve got other things to talk about.”

  Mom sat down next to dad. I guess I don’t think about what my parents look like that often, but now I noticed how salt and pepper dad’s hair had gotten. Along with those thick glasses, he looked older than I remembered, with a few more wrinkles around his eyes. Mom looked washed out, like this had sucked the color right out of her skin.

  “Why don’t you focus on feeling better?” Mom started. “We can take it slow.”

  “Listen, mom, dad,” I said, my chest getting tight. “I’m not stupid. This might change things. I might not make it back to the next games. Or even onto a board…”

  “Might.” Mom jabbed a finger in the air. “Might change things. But you’re a hard worker. We don’t have any reason to think you can’t work your way back.”

  “I don’t know if…” I stopped. I wasn’t sure about anything. I hadn’t spoken to any doctors yet.

  “We’ll be here for you, son,” Dad said, his voice breaking. “No matter what happens, okay?”