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  Rosette was still living in Coos Bay and attending the community college. She was just finishing her shift at a small fish-and-chips shack right along the water when Trey stepped out of his truck in the parking lot. Of course they recognized each other, but everything felt different. He was an adult. His own person. She paused and stared at him, looking so handsome and grown up, and completely trim and toned. He looked amazing, especially when he suddenly flashed her a blazing, heart-stopping smile. “Rosette!”

  He walked right over, sure of himself, and held out a hand. She shook it, but something made her want more, and she stepped forward and grabbed him in a hug. “Trey, oh my gosh! I didn’t know you were back.”

  She had a boyfriend at the time. His name was Stan, and they’d been together for three months. Back then, three months was serious. They’d been saying “I love you” since two months, and she usually counted the hours until she would see him again. That changed right then and there. Stan seemed so childish and unmotivated compared to Trey.

  They went to the beach and walked while laughing and talking about memories from school and what their friends were up to. Trey’s eyes were so pastel blue, like the most perfect summer sky you’ve ever seen, and his smile was so sure. It seemed like the combined beauty of the ocean, the surf, and the beach was there just to highlight how handsome he was.

  “Want to go to a movie tonight?” he asked.

  She barely thought about Stan when she answered, “I’d love to! It’ll be fun to catch up!” Actually, she completely forgot she had a boyfriend until she drove to Angel’s house to squeal the news.

  “Um, Rosette,” her friend had asked. “Don’t you think Stan will mind?”

  Stan. She wasn’t sure what to do, so she didn’t call Stan that day. Instead she got ready in her favorite jeans and a new lacy blue shirt, and she flat ironed her hair to make it long, straight, and shiny. She looked great when Trey came by the house to pick her up.

  It was a tough choice on the movie between Spider-Man; the new Star Wars movie, Attack of the Clones; and some thriller called Signs. Everyone was talking about Spider-Man, and it seemed like the most romantic. The previews had shown Spider-Man hanging upside down in the rain, kissing Mary Jane. Trey bought popcorn and a root beer to share, since he remembered she liked root beer. The movie delivered, and it seemed to reflect their feelings for each other. After the movie started, Trey slid his arm around her.

  Towards the end of the movie, she thought he wanted to kiss her. Their heads were tilted together, touching, and she could have just turned her face. For some reason, she was nervous about kissing him. Maybe it was because they had been friends for so long. Or maybe it was the opposite, and she was nervous because they hadn’t seen each other in a while.

  After the movie, they ran into a few other friends from high school, and that took the tension off. It almost seemed to derail the mood. They ended up laughing and kidding around like old times, and later he drove her home. Maybe she’d been wrong about that funny spark earlier in the day. In only made matters worse when he walked her to the door. It was like a date, but maybe they were just friends. She hugged him, almost holding her breath with uncertainty.

  He leaned back enough to kiss her on the cheek. “I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”

  “Goodnight!” she smiled and waved, and went inside, even more confused.

  That’s when things got a bit stickier. Rosette wasn’t sure if Trey liked her that way, so she didn’t break things off with Stan. Being a mature college girl, she childishly avoided him.

  That Saturday, Trey took her to the beach and then to dinner, and when he took her home, he showed her a love poem and told her about his notebook full of them. That’s when they kissed. It was long and passionate. She smiled like a fool all night, even when she went to bed.

  The next day Trey found out she had a boyfriend. They didn’t talk for a week. She almost lost him.

  Her friend Angel was mad at her for a while too, which didn’t make sense until she confessed she had secretly liked Stan. Back then, when love conquered all, including common sense, the other stuff didn’t matter. Rosette loved Trey and wanted to be with him. That’s all she cared about.

  Wasn’t it funny how she could step into that memory and feel that way again? It made it all the more jolting to think about her life now.

  Rosette shivered and realized the bathwater was almost cold. She thought about taking a hot shower to warm up, if there even was hot water, but she dragged herself out instead and wrapped in a towel. It was plenty late enough to go to bed, so she dressed in pajamas and crawled under the covers, just starting to warm up again.

  Chapter Three

  Trey sat in the office that night with the phone in his hand for a long time, thinking. Finally he called his boss, despite the time. It was almost ten but he needed to do this. He’d been off for a week and a day now. That meant Ricky had been gone eight days. They’d offered him more time, but he didn’t want it now. How could he stay home tomorrow and face Rosette? They had agreed to talk about things after the funeral, but he just wasn’t ready.

  He didn’t like the idea of EMT work right now either, not with his mind so foggy, but he hoped that dealing with other people’s emergencies would clear his head. It’d be better than things at home…unless they got one of those calls. But most calls weren’t that bad. Some were even fairly minor. Nothing like dealing with wounded soldiers. Here they got calls for heart attacks, strokes, or car wrecks. He could handle broken bones and some bleeding. It only really got to him when there was blood everywhere and horrific wounds. It took a hell of a car accident here to match a blown-apart Marine.

  Harry answered before Trey felt ready.

  “Harry, hi, I wanted to let you know I’d like to come in tomorrow.”

  “Trey, are you sure that’s a good idea? I know things gotta be tough. You’ve got a family to think about… I don’t want to push things.”

  So Harry still thought he couldn’t handle coming back to work. It’d been months since he’d had a flashback; did Harry think Ricky’s death would drop him into that dark tunnel again?

  “I need to do something productive,” Trey replied, offering the best argument he could think of. “Rosette’s got things covered here at the house.”

  He stopped to let Harry answer, but that answer didn’t come. It was silent on the line, the kind of silence you hear at a race right before the starter’s pistol fires. Where was that shot? “…Harry?”

  “I…all right. It’s up to you. If you think you’re ready, I’ll put you in the schedule tomorrow.”

  Ready can be a funny thing to define.

  ~ ~ ~

  Rosette awoke to the faint sound of Trey’s cell phone ringing downstairs. Funny how a mother wakes to the quietest noise, even a soft newborn cough. Thank the good Lord they were past those early years with the kids. She rolled over in bed to squint at the alarm clock.

  It was midnight. Who would be calling him so late? It didn’t sound like he’d answered it, but he could be returning the call. Rosette sat up, feeling alternating chills and waves of heat, as she feathered out the suspicions creeping in. Did he think they’d already severed their tie, and he was now free to talk to other women?

  The landline phone on the nightstand rang.

  Her heart skipped a couple beats. Something had happened, she could feel it, but what could be worse than Ricky dying?

  She always answered the phone with “hello,” but this time she picked up the phone and spoke with a shaky voice. “Yes?”

  “Rosette?” a rough voice asked. Harry. Trey’s boss.

  “Y-yes?”

  “It’s Amanda. She has you and Trey down as her emergency contacts. We just brought her into the ER. We need you here right away. I tried Trey and couldn’t get him. Is he there?”

  She said yes again and listened without hearing the rest of Harry’s words before ending the call.

  OhMyGod OhMyGod OhMyGod. Rosette threw ba
ck the covers and ran out of the room, down the stairs, and into the living room, hitting the light switch on her way as she almost charged right into the couch.

  She startled Trey so badly that he threw up his hands, flinching and turning away. Great. Not a flashback now. She needed him.

  “Amanda’s at the hospital. We need to go.”

  He shielded his eyes from the light. “She’s in labor?”

  A momentary relief sank through her, warm and comforting. Of course Amanda was just in labor. Why hadn’t she thought of that? Because Harry sounded… “I don’t know. Harry called and said she’s in the ER, and we need to get there right away.”

  Trey rose as she spoke. She caught sight of his expression only briefly, but it didn’t calm her fears. Something had to be wrong. Maybe Amanda went into labor too early due to grief. Maybe they were looking at an emergency C-section and needed family there.

  Realizing she was in her pajamas, Rosette ran back upstairs to change. She yanked on a pair of jeans and pulled a sweater over her pajama top. She emerged and found Alex in the hallway.

  “What’s going on?” His face was white, his arms crossed protectively.

  “Amanda’s in the hospital. I need you to stay with the kids.” She was at the top of the stairs by then, pausing for a split second, the words “it’ll be okay” in her mouth. But she couldn’t make herself say it. In the dim light from the bathroom, she could see his pinched face.

  She hurried back and wrapped an arm around him in a quick hug.

  “Okay, but call me, please? When you know what’s going on?” he said. He must have heard her talking to Trey.

  She called, “I will,” on her way down the stairs. She grabbed her coat and pulled it on. Trey was dressed and walking toward the door leading into the garage. He didn’t have a coat on, but one look at his face kept her from mentioning it. He started the car and opened the garage door all in the same second, and then the car flew backwards. She grabbed the door handle and only buckled once he’d put the car into drive.

  It would take about thirty minutes to drive up Cape Arago Highway, over the bridge, and then across to the other side of Coos Bay where the hospital was located. The time ticked by in painful silence. The wipers had a slight squeak as they ran back and forth. She’d always hated squeaky wipers. In fact, she usually had them changed whenever she took her car in for an oil change. Trey didn’t seem to notice the noise at all. She prayed he would notice the wet road conditions while driving.

  She moved her head just enough to see him without really looking at him. He gripped the wheel and stared ahead with a scary intensity. She wanted to say something, to hear him say it’d be okay, but it was about that time she remembered. He wasn’t really her husband anymore.

  Focus on Amanda. What if something were terribly wrong? Maybe the baby was in trouble. Her labor must have come on suddenly because she would have called otherwise.

  She couldn’t believe she’d been in the bath daydreaming. Why hadn’t she stayed with Amanda? Summer was just a messed-up kid, even at twenty-one. They shouldn’t have left Amanda alone with just Summer there.

  Please don’t let the baby die. Please-don’t-let-her-die, pleasedon’tletherdie.

  ~ ~ ~

  Alex went downstairs for a glass of juice. That’s what he told himself. His entire body was stiff. That feeling of gripping something too long and then not being able to uncurl your fist.

  Trey had left the light on in the living room. When Alex turned it off, he noticed the blanket on the couch. Huh? Trey and Rosette were fighting? Alex reached and turned the light off in slow motion, thinking up a bunch of reasons why Trey had slept down here. Maybe one of them snored and kept the other up. He really didn’t want to think about it. Or why Rosette had looked so scared when they left.

  Amanda’s baby was due soon, he thought. They would probably call in the morning with the good news. They needed some good news. He went back upstairs, the steps creaking all the way. The old house had belonged to his grandfather and then his dad—now it belonged to Trey and Rosette. It was just him and Dad until his dad died, and then Trey moved back in with Rosette and the kids. Sometimes Alex wondered if it should have been his house; but he was “just a kid.”

  Not that he minded having Trey and his family here. He really felt like they were one big family, actually.

  “Alex?” Jake stood in the hallway with his blankie hanging from one hand. “Did Mom and Dad leave?”

  “Hey buddy.” Alex scooped him up and carried him back into his room. “They just went to check on Aunt Amanda.”

  “And the baby?” Jake’s voice rose in pitch. Crap. Jake was wide awake now. Alex would probably have to pull out that book about the rabbit to get him back to sleep.

  “Maybe.” Alex didn’t want to explain what was going on—he didn’t have any idea anyway. So he grabbed Jake’s favorite book, tucked him back to bed and read to Jake until he fell asleep. Alex lay on the edge of Jake’s bed for a few minutes, thinking. He had Summer’s cell number, and maybe she would tell him more than Rosette. He went into his own room and shut the door to call her.

  She answered after three rings. “Hey, what’re you doing up so late?” Her voice slipped over the words, just audible through loud music.

  “How’s Amanda?” He skipped pleasantries too. “Is she okay?”

  A pause. “Why?”

  “Cause Trey and Rosette flew outta here like it was an emergency. Having a baby isn’t that…bad, is it?” That was a lame word, but he couldn’t think of a better one this late. Summer didn’t answer, so he added, “She’s at the hospital.”

  “I gotta go.” The line went dead.

  Well, that sure helped.

  ~ ~ ~

  Trey pulled the car into the emergency entrance. “Go find out what you can while I park.”

  Rosette nodded and got out, hurrying inside without looking back. Inside the doors, she spotted Rachel behind the counter and started over. They knew her from Trey’s work, plus Rachel had been at counter several of the times Rosette had rushed Candice in with lung problems in the middle of the night.

  She almost didn’t see the person already in line. He was tall and talking low, in a way that sounded like he planned to talk for a while.

  Rachel motioned, and for once her usually professional face was laced with concern. The man stood off to the side, still trying to chat.

  “Amanda Sinclair,” Rosette uttered. “Harry said they brought her in here.” Her tone begged for an explanation but Rachel looked down.

  “I’ll get a doctor.” She rose and hurried away, leaving Rosette baffled. Trey appeared behind her, breathing fast like he’d run from the car.

  She looked at him, not sure what to say to his questioning expression, when someone else called, “Sinclair.”

  A woman was holding the inner ER door open for them. “Trey and Rosette?” She motioned for them to follow her. They didn’t go far. There was a small family waiting room back in the ER, for cases like this. Once in the room, the doctor turned to them. “I’m Dr. Rosenberg. I’m treating Amanda, and we’re doing everything we can, but she suffered several traumatic injuries in her accident.”

  “Accident?” Trey asked. “This isn’t related to her pregnancy?”

  The doctor shook her head. “No. She was brought in from a vehicular accident. She has multiple skull fractures.” She paused, shaking her head like that didn’t cover it. “Her skull was smashed from two sides, along with her upper body… There just isn’t much we can do. I’m sorry. I came out to tell you we must perform an emergency Caesarean section. We don’t know the extent of the injuries to the fetus, but we might be able to save it.”

  Save it? She would have never, ever, even in ten lifetimes, thought they’d lose Amanda. Not in this day and age. It just doesn’t happen. An accident? None of it made sense. “But Amanda still has a chance, right?”

  Dr. Rosenberg shook her head. “I’m sorry.”

  Rosette gasped, th
e air sticking in her throat and turning into a cough-like sob.

  Trey watched the life seep out of his wife as she sank down in a chair.

  Dr. Rosenberg looked between them. “We need to perform the C-section right now.”

  He nodded.

  “I’ll send news as soon as I can.” The doctor rushed out.

  He glanced at Rosette and sat down, unsure of what else to do. A few items came to mind. Call his co-workers and piece together the accident. Comfort Rosette. Call someone so they wouldn’t be alone. He didn’t do any of those things.

  “What should I tell Alex?” Rosette asked, her phone sitting in her hand. She was staring off into space, not at Trey. He didn’t think she was actually asking him. Some time passed, he wasn’t sure how long, and he vaguely registered that she’d texted something to Alex. Trey didn’t want to know what she’d said.

  The night stretched out, but it was also a blur. Was it an accident? It was too horrific, too soon after Ricky’s death to feel like it was a random event. He considered Amanda through professional eyes, relying on his training. Had he missed something? Of course she had been distraught, but who wouldn’t have been.

  Trey clenched his fists, keeping himself from voicing his doubts and worries to Rosette. He had to be wrong.

  After an hour, or maybe several, he dug his phone from his pocket and tried several of the EMTs. Finally he stood and told Rosette, “Harry’s outside. I’m going to go see what I can find out about what happened.”

  Harry was waiting, pacing. The shorter and older man turned when the ER doors opened, and he approached Trey, throwing one arm around him in a rare embrace. “Man, I don’t know what to say. Are you holding up okay?”

  Trey shrugged. It wasn’t like he could physically fall apart, exploding into tiny pieces. It only felt that way. “I need to know.”